Posted by Willy Mac

This will be the first post in a proposed series that I will be doing to help you ham ‘n’ eggers out there with tailgating.  User submissions will be more than welcomed and if you’d like to contribute a few things, stories, pictures, etc. please shoot us an email to ‘dannyfordisgod -at- gmail -dot- com’ and we will consider putting you in a future segment. Topics we’ll cover are coolers, flags/poles, music/radios, games, accessories, grilling, water coolers, and other things.

For this inaugural post we’ll be talking coolers of all shapes, sizes, and purposes. More after the jump.

Continue Reading “THE RIGHT WEAPONS FOR PROPER TAILGAITING: COOLERS” »

Posted by Willy Mac

“No nobler monument could be raised to the great Carolinian than such an institution on the spot where the tradition of his great and beautiful life would be most strongly felt, and where the youthful mind of the State could be trained to take up his work.”

- Thomas Green Clemson

Yesterday we released an article verbatim that was published in the Charleston Post & Courier that has caused quite a bit of controversy not only in the realm of Block-C, but in the whole Clemson community.  It seems that there is a substantial split of ideas.  To preface this article, I’d like to make a few bullet points:

• I’ve met Jim Barker.  He’s a good person.  He’s also a good Clemson person.  I have nothing against him personally.  I just have issue with his direction and possibly his motives.
• It’s not my intentions to blame anyone or put down Clemson.  Everything I say and do, keep in mind that I have Clemson in my best interest.
• I have grown up with respect and love for Clemson since I was old enough to comprehend what Clemson was.  I’m a graduate of Clemson and a South Carolina native born and raised in Simpsonville.
• I will admit to you up front that I have been extremely privileged to be afforded the opportunities in life that have come my way.  I’m damn nearly spoiled and I feel guilty just bringing it up.  With that being said, I don’t think that takes any credibility away when part of my intention is to stick up for those South Carolinians who either can’t afford to go to Clemson with the hiking tuition or weren’t afforded great in-state education but are generally smart people looking to further their education at Clemson.  I’m not talking about the water heads that don’t deserve to get in, I’m talking about bubble kids who bring a lot to the table but get bumped in lieu of a kid that has never heard of Clemson until the application process started.
• What Catherine Watt did was absolutely not right.  She definitely threw Clemson under the bus and it wasn’t her place to say something like this.  I don’t condone what she did in the least, even if it kind of gave me a bittersweet happiness inside.
• If you’re an out-of-stater that stuck around the region after graduating: Good for you.  You’re the exception to the rule in this case.  I know you stuck around.  No need to tell me.
• Against my better judgment, I feel like doing something that I shouldn’t do but I feel that it is necessary at this point in time to do.  I don’t want you to think that some nameless coward is putting this out there.  My name is Will McCameron.  I graduated from Clemson in 2008.  I was there a little longer than I should have been and got a degree that I probably won’t use.  But I was and still am very active in Clemson life, club sports, etc. Don’t facebook me unless you know me.  Also, please don’t find me, kill me, and attempt to wear my skin.
• OOS = Out-of-state

Be warned, this is an essay.  It’s worth reading and thinking about though.  More after the jump.

Continue Reading “THE US NEWS COLLEGE REPORT IS A PAGEANT” »

Posted by Chili

That man is old enough to remember when Florida State was all-girls, and apparently some Nole fans carry on that proud tradition by continuing to be whiny bitches.

The other day, Deadspin picked up on this hilarious photo from Rivals of the Dabo Swinney Fantasy Camp or whatever it’s officially called, we mentioned it on our Twitter feed (I WILL NOT SAY THAT I “TWEETED” IT), it was seen in the forums and around the web. This morning, Tomahawk Nation took their turn with it, and couldn’t help but continue their completely unsubstantiated claim that Clemson coaches lied to FSU recruits with this caption:

About the 12 player thing, never mind that scholarship numbers wouldn’t have prevented more signees without a loss of scholarships for existing players (a not uncommon practice at some *cough SEC cough* schools), Clemson only signed 12 and that doesn’t seem like many so let’s not look into it any further but to mock them for their small class. Ha, see, we mocked you for your small class. Also never mind a mid-season coaching change or the inevitable recruiting shakeup that is bound to occur because of that, they only signed TWELVE it’s hilarious, they couldn’t even cop a baker’s dozen.

Anyway, back to that whole claim about lying to recruits, if you recall from the earlier situation detailed in this missive from Willy Mac and myself, TN used a bullshit anonymous source to claim Clemson coaches were waging a systematic misinformation campaign against Florida State by lying to recruits about the possible ramifications of FSU’s NCAA sanctions. Then, desperately grasping at straws in an attempt to legitimize their claim, they tried to use a single nebulous line from an ESPN interview with a recruit to prove their claim. Then they whined like fucking babies that Clemson should issue a formal apology to Florida State.

What is hilarious to me is that, not only did they essentially fabricate a situation, then use a quote from a recruit off an ESPN article with absolutely no inference of where he got the idea in his head that FSU’s sanctions might be big ones and attempted to use that quote to tie it back to their original messageboard gossip-level claim, they now look back on that situation and somehow in their Garnet colored glasses Dabo was “caught with his hand in the proverbial cookie jar.” Seriously? They’re reflecting on the supposed situation of several months ago as if it were an actual event. Really? If by “caught” you mean “not seen anywhere near or documented by any reliable source,” and by “cookie jar” you mean “complete fabrication of your imagination” then sure, I guess you’re right!

The commenters on that site are really something special, too. Usually that kind of gathering of backslapping, guffawing bufoons ends with a cookie covered with cum, here it just ends in comments that remind me why I’m glad we don’t write for SB Nation and why I wish crib death was far more common in the Florida panhandle.

Posted by Chili

WHAT WILLY KORN DID ON HIS SPRING BREAK
AS IMAGINED BY EKR

I DON’T KNOW WHAT WILLY KORN DID FOR HIS SPRING BREAK LAST WEEK, AND A CERTAIN “RESTRAINING ORDER” IS KEEPING ME FROM “LEGALLY TRACKING HIS MOVEMENTS” ANYMORE, SO I AM IMAGINEERING SOME SHIT UP THAT I BET THAT GOLDEN ARMED FUCKER DID LAST WEEK.

Look, Clemson isn’t the most exciting place on the planet (unlike the inside parts of my Zubaz, HIYOOOOOOO), but WILLY KORN was stuck in Tiger Town because of spring practice so he had no choice. Now, WILLY KORN is straight up known in the Spring Break hot spots of the world. Rumor has it that he’s banned from every Carlos N’ Charlies this side of the equator because of an incident involving a bandoleer of tequila shots, a greased up bottle of Cabo Wabo, and a member of the Rutgers dance team. So anyway, he’s stuck in Clemson because he has to show out and melt bitches faces off with his five finger exploding palm death TD pass and whatnot.  So what’s a platinum shouldered future LEGEND to do? GET EXTREME AND PUSH IT TO THE MAX! ALL IN!

So, with only his supply of spring break snacks in front of him, WILLY KORN went all fuckin’ Ty Pennington on a kick-ass houseboat to rock out (cock-out optional) on Hartwell ALL WEEK LONG. You’d be surprised how seaworthy a 2 story houseboat made predominantly from Slim-Jims and grape Big League Chew is… if you weren’t WILLY KORN… which you AREN’T…. unless you are….  The highlight of the EXTREME HOUSEBOAT is definitely the vagina-shaped swimming pool. Just like in life, WILLY KORN is always ready to dive in head first. so anyway, after the upstate fat cats drained Lake Keowee to fill Hartwell to the brim so WILLY KORN could experience optimum EXTREME HOUSEBOAT CONDITIONS, he threw an EXTREME HOUSEBOAT SPRING BREAK PARTY. Everybody was there: Macho Man, Gallagher, some of those X-Games dudes, that DJ from Zoolander, Stacey Keibler, that redhead chick who danced on top of that car in that Whitesnake video, your mom, President Barker, The Fridge, the guy who talked real fast in those Micro Machines commercials, Matthew Lesko, your sister, me, Octomom, the Swedish Bikini Team, some Vivid girls, OH YEAH and your mom.

Dude, it was just like when MTV Spring Break went to that fuckin’ lake in New Mexico or wherever back in the 90s. I bet that dude from The Grind was there trying to pick up chicks just by doing an up-tempo dance to How Bizarre telling them that he’s that dude from The Grind. I bet that shit works like a motherfucker, too. But then in ten years some chick is all like “I banged that dude from The Grind that one time” and all her friends know it but they try to keep it from her fiance because he’s from a really conservative family and they wouldn’t approve of his wife having taken some Grindcock back in the day. Yeah.

WILLY KORN‘s WRESTLING NAME IS SONIC FRANKENSTEIN. MARINATE ON THAT.

ALSO, IF YOU LIKE THAT FLO-RIDA SONG “RIGHT ROUND” THEN PLEASE GO FUCK YOURSELF.

EKRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR OUT

Posted by Block-C Staff

POINT, COUNTERPOINT: CLEMSON BASKETBALL 08-09

Point: Things are good

Willy Mac: Some people are going to look at this ending in a negative light.  I’m not trying to blow sunshine up your ass avert your attention from the fact that we should have beaten Wake Forest, yet again, and failed to do so.  Not only that, but we stumbled lazily without hope and ambition throughout the latter part of our conference schedule.  But the television announcers reminded me last night right before I switched off the channel that the first season is over.  Now comes the fun part.

Now before you continue, shake off that familiar “Oh, woe is me” feeling that Clemson sports always gives you the morning after a loss.

Okay, now here is one important fact to remember: We were pretty much in the same boat last year right before the ACC Tournament.  Granted, we ended stronger than this, but the records reflect the same amount of effort.  Given the loss of leadership and maturation of young talent (something I’ve been shoving down your throat all year, sorry), I’d say that we’re poised to do great things this weekend.

Last year we were uneasy going into the the tournament in Charlotte, but Purnell had us firing on all cylinders and you should feel confident that he can do it again with nearly equal talent.

Chili: Willy Mac lays out pretty good points above in that the Tigers sort of shat the bed towards the end of the schedule, but given that we lost some big puzzle pieces from last year things aren’t awful. I still feel that the Tigers will notch Purnell’s first NCAA tournament win for him this year. Watching some of the losses down the stretch, it was clear that Purnell was experimenting with lineup and defensive sets, especially in the Virginia Tech game where he continued forcing the press long after it was evident that the Hokies were just going to pass over it. This is likely a change in mindset from a regular season mentality to more of a tweak-it attitude to make final preparations for the postseason, and that’s alright by me. Did we lose games we should’ve won? Absolutely, and that sucks, but there are still more positives than negatives to take away from this regular season.

Counterpoint: Things are bad

Clemson football fan who went to a couple basketball games this year: Horseshit. Toughness. That’s what this team needs, is some toughness (in case you didn’t see it the first time I typed “toughness.”). Toughness. I’m forgetting the horrendous Shyatt years and the slow progress of Oliver Purnell’s first couple of years and suddenly thinking we should win the same games this year as the top tier of the league. Each loss we suffered this season was a painful dagger jabbed into my heart (either that or all the bacon explosions are starting to cause a murmur).

You know what I miss is the Barnes era. Yeah, back when we were real good and real tough. Why do I miss the Barnes era so much? Probably because it exists as a fuzzy memory in my brain right beside the gaping hole in my neuron network caused by mainlining Busch Light for the better part of 15 years. Because I don’t live the Barnes era day-in and day-out like I do the Purnell era it seems somehow fantastic and amazing as I forget all the bad crap, and I’m sure no correlating phenomenon can be found in my Clemson football obsession. Nope, none whatsoever.

Besides, 23-7 doesn’t get you a New Year’s Day bowl game.

Counter-counterpoint: Willy Korn plays football.

EKR: OBLONG BALLS ARE FUCKING SUPERIOR. They’re easier to grip without gigantic freak hands, they have laces, and when thrown against a hard surface their bounce is as unpredictable as the heart of a beautiful woman. A beautiful woman named WILLY KORN. Wait, what? Why the hell are we even talking about BASKETBALL? When I was first approached to throw my two senses (I never understood that, I thought we had 6 senses? How do you pick just two? Who am I, Anne Frank?) at this subject I figured, yeah, okay WILLY KORN finally decided to play basketball, so I guess we’re undefeated huh? NO. No, I was SADLY MISTAKEN. EXTREME DISAPPOINTMENT. My overall take on the basketball season: DOOOOOON’T CARE. I was hoping for NBA Jam style dunks that light the  fucking rim on fire, but WILLY KORN has decided to stick to football and focus his extemitudes on that endevoration. Fair enough, the KORN moves in mysterious ways, so I guess I’ll just have to watch this Trevor Booker guy stretch rims like Goatse.

EKR OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT