Archive for October 2007
Posted by Chili
INTERNATIONAL CAPS LOCK DAY, PERFECT FOR EXTREME KORN REPORT.
YOU KNOW THAT PART IN FAST AND FURIOUS (WHICH ONE? SHIT, ANY) WHERE THE ONE EXTREME WIFE-BEATER WEARING KINDA SPANISHY DUDE LOSES HIS CAR IN A BADASS STREET RACE? AND, LIKE, HE’S TORN THE FUCK UP BECAUSE HE JUST LOST HIS SWEET ASS RICER WITH ONE OF THOSE AWESOME LOUD ASS MUFFLERS? MULTIPLY THAT BY A BILLION AND THAT’S ONE TENTH OF HOW I FEEL TODAY. NOT EXTREME. NOT EXTREME AT ALL, PLANETEERS.
SO WHY IS KORN HOLDING HIMSELF OUT? HERE ARE SOME POSSIBLE ANSWERS:
1) TO HAVE HIS LAST SEMESTER COINCIDE WITH THE FINAL YEAR OF THE MAYAN CALENDAR (AND PROBABLY THE WORLD) IN 2012.
2) TO HAVE MORE TIME TO READ E.K.R.
3) HE LOST A BET WITH CULLEN HARPER AND HAD TO EITHER KILL HIMSELF OR REDSHIRT. OF COURSE A KORN IS IMMORTAL AND CANNOT KILL ITSELF, IT MUST BE BEHEADED BY ANOTHER KORN, JACKASSES.
4) AIDS
5) THIS SPACE LEFT INTENTIONALLY BLANK.
I DON’T KNOW WHY KORN IS SANDBAGGIN. THEN AGAIN I DON’T TRY AND UNDERSTAND WILLY KORN, THAT’S LITERALLY HUMANLY IMPOSSIBLE!!!1!!1!
LOOK, WILLY, IF YOU’RE READING THIS, AND GOD I HOPE YOU ARE, PLEASE WILL YOURSELF HEALED. COME BACK TO US. MY LIFE HAS LOST ALL MEANING. ONLY SWEET, SWEET BOOZE CAN SOOTHE MY SOUL NOW. I HAVEN’T BATHED, I STOPPED GOING TO WORK, MY DIET CONSISTS OF FRIED BALONEY SANDWICHES COVERED IN RAMEN NOODLE SEASONING. CAN YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE… I MEAN SERIOUSLY COMPREHEND… THAT I HAD TO WATCH TRIBBLE FUCKING REESE AT QUARTERBACK? MOTHERFUCKER NAMED AFTER A STAR TRAK EPPY. COME BACK KORN, COME BACK! I’LL SUM UP MY FEELINGS WITH THE FOLLOWING CLIP FROM BLUE VELVET.
CULLEN HARPER? FUCK THAT SHIT. WILLY FUCKIN KORN!
Posted by Block-C Staff
Well, after good showings the last 2 weeks, I’m back where I belong in the standings I guess. Things are again equalizing, and even after missing a week, Tully is back in this thing for sure. We’ve got two competitors that have called it quits , so we’re down to seven competitors now. Suprisingly, this weeks overall champion was Willy Mac, and the fan base is wondering whom he paid for the advice. Here’s how things looked this week.
1) Sam +88 (6)
2) Lyrtch +79 (9)
3) Chili +78 (10)
4) Willy Mac +75 (10)
T5) Tully +74 (10)
T5) Seigler +74 (5)
7) NoleCC +72 (6)
8) Brad DNF
Posted by Block-C Staff
In a game that will surely quell the angry hoard’s cries for Tommy’s head — temporarily — the Tigers cockpunched the Chippewas 70-14. The game started slowly with CMU taking a temporary lead of 7-0 by driving the ball down the field with relative ease. The defense stiffened, however, and only allowed one more score on the day and had several turnovers to their credit. The kickoff team is still a little shaky, giving up a 30 or so yard return on the opening boot.
Early stats have the Tigers accruing 656 yards of total offense; 307 in the air and 349 on the ground. Harper was a fantastic 19-21 for 265 yards, 4 touchdowns and just 1 interception. Aaron Kelly led all receivers with 121 yards and 2 touchdowns while rushing was split 112 for Sadat Chambers, 96 for CJ Spiller, and 88 for James Davis. Sadat and CJ had a rushing touchdown each while Davis had two to his credit. Other stats of note show that Clemson only punted once the whole game, Mark Buchholz was perfect on extra points but again was off on a field goal from 48 yards. Another dozen or so missed FGs from that distance and the coaches might get the hint.
The Korn redshirt question continues to linger as Tribble Reese was put in at the end of the game instead of Willy. It looks like the coaches are going to hold Korn out and hope to be able to get a medical redshirt based on his shoulder injury against Furman. If a dire need arises later in the season they could blow his redshirt and put him in. The EKR has its own take on the matter, and we’ll get to that later. EKR has been drinking a lot since Korn stopped getting PT, we’re all a little concerned. EKR’s room in the DFIG offices smells like urine and Busch Light and a tinge of vomit.
Check out the ESPN box score for a more sober review.
Posted by Willy Mac
Central Michigan (4-3) @ Clemson (4-2, 2-2 ACC) Saturday, October 20th, NOON EST, ESPNU, XM 190.
The Line: Clemson -17
Edge goes to:
Offense: Clemson
Defense: Clemson: Ranked first in the ACC in total defense, eighth in the nation in total defense, and first in the nation in pass defense.
Special Teams: Who knows
Intangibles: Clemson and the noise of Death Val… nevermind, no one is going to show up anyways. It is homecoming though.
Our Panel of More than Pissed Prognasticators Say:
Willy Mac: Honestly, from what I hear the team has a new fire now. They’ve already put the first half of the season behind them and I think they come out and beat a very hard non-BCS team. Central Michigan is a tough team, but we’ve had a bye week to get our heads right and I think we come out swinging CMU has the ability to be the Cinderella team in two years when there QB (Lefevour) is a senior. He kinda reminds me of Stefan Lefors, the Louisville QB before Brohm. This team should be taken seriously and I’m sure that Bowden has got the team back in the right mindset. Let’s just hope that we aren’t forced to play linemen like Bobby Hutchinson anymore.
Clemson 35, Central Michigan 12
Chili: I’ll be watching the special teams closely in this game as a predictor of future performance this season. Similar to how the special teams gaffs of the Furman and NCSU games evidenced our deficiencies in these areas prior to the VT debacle, how we perform against CMU may show if any improvement can be hoped for. It will be interesting to see if this team can bounce back or if the entire season is in the shitter. You mean it’s not now? Not really, there could still be some satisfying games in the 2nd half. Clemson’s consistent inconsistency means that there will almost assuredly be some disappointments to come, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to watch, I’m just not going to care as much.
Clemson 33, CMU 21
Seigler: There is definitely a part of me that wants Clemson to get embarrassed , if only for the sole reason that it might force the Clemson AD to force Tommy out the door ( even if it costs 2.5 Mil). I’m sick of TB, plain and simple, he’s done some good for the school, but I don’t want to have a heart attack at such a young age, and riding the emotional roller coaster that is TB football, I think it just might happen, if not that then definitely liver failure. Ok, before I turn this post into a Tommy hate fest, let me focus again on the game. In typical Clemson style, I think we’ll be able, in all honesty, to put up a grand old performance this weekend. I have it on good authority that we’ll have some superior officiating on the field, and I know that the team, if not the coaches are ready to put the last 2 games behind them. Clemson, the whole team, has to put up a great effort this week to pick up our reputation from the mud, so to speak. I think the Tigers will do just that and dominate, even though I think Central Michigan might put up more of a fight than the average fan gives them credit for. Cullen Harper and Willy Korn both see the field in the first equal time game of the year, I think. I’m going out on a limb there, but Korn has been promised more playing time, and I think Tommy and Rob Spence might just be willing to split time to give it to him. Either way, it’s a blowout in the Valley, and all the Tiger net fans will be jumping back on the Tommy bandwagon.
Clemson 48, Central Michigan 21
Posted by Block-C Staff
Post suggestions in the comments area and we’ll tweak the poll before Wednesday.
| Rank | Team | Delta |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Ohio State | 2 |
| 2 | Boston College | 2 |
| 3 | Oklahoma | 2 |
| 4 | South Florida | 3 |
| 5 | LSU | 4 |
| 6 | Oregon | 2 |
| 7 | Southern Cal | 1 |
| 8 | West Virginia | 1 |
| 9 | Virginia Tech | 1 |
| 10 | South Carolina | 2 |
| 11 | Kentucky | 6 |
| 12 | California | 10 |
| 13 | Arizona State | 5 |
| 14 | Hawaii | 1 |
| 15 | Florida | 4 |
| 16 | Missouri | 3 |
| 17 | Kansas | 4 |
| 18 | Georgia | 4 |
| 19 | Texas | 4 |
| 20 | Cincinnati | 4 |
| 21 | Wake Forest | 5 |
| 22 | Auburn | 4 |
| 23 | Texas Tech | 3 |
| 24 | Michigan | 2 |
| 25 | Virginia | — |
Posted by Block-C Staff
This week was a good week, for most in the competition, still Sam holds his commanding lead. All hope is not lost though people, unless you just forget to submit picks for a week. I know things come up, but if you plan to stay in the running, missing even one week might put you completely out of it. That being said, and because we have several players who have failed to submit picks this week, we’re instituting a new rule. If you miss more than 2 weeks picks, you’re officially disqualified from competition. Tully, after a strong showing at the beginning has been dropped from 2nd to 7th this week, and Brad has all but taken himself out of competition. Most all involved had a strong week picking, still, we wish the best of luck to all in the future. Here’s how the standings look this week.
1) Sam +82 (10)
2) Lyrtch +70 (9)
3) Seigler +69 (13)
4) Chili +68 (7)
5) NoleCC +66 (5)
6) Willy Mac +65 (9)
7)Tully +64 (0)
8) Brad +52 (0)
9) Captain DNF
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